So, I'm sitting in the office. Alone, which is better than what was going on yesterday. And I've got some Snow Patrol coming through the headphones, mellowing the mood. In an attempt to help the next three hours of my life pass quickly, I decided to update. But the thing that really sucks is that its an insanely beautiful day outside.

Monday morning, I hop a train to Paris. There, its some lovely debriefing with what will hopefully not be ScaryTerry. I'm preparing to vent, making a mental list of everything that has happened over the past 3 months. But I'm starting to think that I don't have enough brain capacity to store everything that's happened. But then, Tuesday morning, it go time. A flight from Paris to Philly to Charlotte and then, oh then, one final stop in the lovely city of Jackson, MS. And then what? Who knows. Readjustment. Starbucks. Quality time with people. Lots of good ole American food. Move on with life. It'll just be nice to finally be somewhere that I feel wanted and useful. Haven't felt that in about, oh I don't know, 3 months.

And how do I feel about all of this? Relief. Glad to finally be getting out of this situation, to finally have breakdowns on a weekly basis and finally get back to my normal, unemotional state. Excited. I'm ready to be home and see people that actually give a crap about me and that I really really miss. That'll be nice. Disappointment. I'm quitting. No matter what anyone says otherwise, I know in my heart that I couldn't hack it and I had to quit. Its something I'm going to have to deal with. Fear. I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing. Sadness. I'm leaving a place that I love, that's completely beautiful and awesome. I'm also leaving my compadre, roommate, and teammate of three months. And I'll miss her. It'll be weird to not sleep three feet away from someone every night or have daily venting sessions. I only hope she doesn't snap one day, climb a clocktower, and kill everyone within 100 yards. That'd be bad.

But this time next week, what will I be doing?! Starbucks! Barnes and Noble! Target! Being home!

I will not, however, be able to see this whenever I want anymore.